If Operating Systems Were Airlines
DOS Air:
Passengers walk onto the runway, grab hold of the plane, push it until it
gets into the air, hop on, then jump off when it hits the ground. They grab
the plane again, push it back into the air, hop on, jump off...
Mac Airways:
The cashiers, flight attendants, and pilots all look the same, talk the
same,and act the same. When you ask the questions about the flight, they
reply that you don't want to know, don't need to know, and would please
return to your seat and watch the movie.
Windows Airlines:
The terminal is neat and clean, the attendants courteous, the pilots capable.
The fleet of Lear jets the carrier operates is immense. Your jet takes off
without a hitch, pushes above the clouds and, at 20,000 feet, explodes without
warning.
OS/2 Skyways:
The terminal is almost empty - only a few prospective passengers mill about.
The announcer says that a flight has just departed, although no planes appear
to be on the runway. Airline personnel apologize profusely to customers
in hushed voices, pointing from time to time to the sleek, powerful jets
outside. They tell each passenger how great the flight will be on these
new jets and how much safer it will be than Windows Airlines, but they will
have to wait a little longer for the technicians to finish the flight systems.
Fly Windows NT:
Passengers carry their seats out onto the tarmac and place them in the outline
of a plane. They sit down, flap their arms, and make jet swooshing sounds
as if they were flying.
Unix Express:
Passengers bring a piece of the airplane and a box of tools with them to
the airport. They gather on the tarmac, arguing about what kind of plane
they want to build. The passengers split into groups and build several different
aircraft but give them all the same name. Only some passengers
reach their destinations, but all of them believe they arrived.
Windows 95 Airlines:
This is supposed to be Windows Airlines' new supersonic fleet of planes.
However, upon closer inspection, passengers find there are really the same
old propellers inside new jet engine casings on the plane. The Airline staff
apologize profusely about the lack of comfort features and finishing coats
of paint on the planes, but assure passengers that they will be receiving
a tune-up any time now, and that the new planes are faster and safer than
the older models. However, passengers who earned frequent flyer miles on
the old Windows Airlines often have trouble converting them over to the
new airline, and many people show up and walk away uninterested, preferring
to wait in the terminal and see if any planes somehow manage to take off
successfully. A few of the planes build up lots of speed on the runway,
but all of them seem to be having great difficulty getting off the ground
for even a short time without crashing.
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